12.01.2007

Hints from Heloise

My aunt introduced me to the hilarity that is Hints from Heloise (a column in the Star Tribune) several years ago and life will never be the same. Heloise provides advice for housekeepers - and readers submit their tips for dealing with life's pesky little hassles. It's revolutionary stuff. So I'm sharing some of these brilliant tips with you - in hopes that maybe your life will be bettered, as mine has been.
Dear Heloise: Many times when using a public restroom, I find out too late that there is no toilet tissue. I'm sure this has happened to many of us ladies. In order to avoid this problem, reach for the tissue before preparing to use the toilet. You quickly and conveniently learn if there is tissue in that stall, and then you can go to another stall if need be. -- Gloria, Winter Haven, Fla.
Dear Heloise: When making a sandwich, I pull two pieces of bread out of the loaf. I spread the peanut butter on the downside of the top piece and the jelly on the upside of the bottom piece. This allows the pieces to fit together perfectly when pressed. This saves many embarrassing jelly drops on my shirt. Now everyone wants me to make the sandwiches because they think I am so clever. -- Gabrielle, Katy, Texas
Dear Heloise: My wife and I have discovered a way to create extra room in our luggage for the things we pick up along the way in our travels. Rather than taking our best underwear when we start out, we take the stuff that is ready to retire. At the end of each day, out go the old undies, and day by day we have more room for the things we buy. -- James Adams, via e-mail
No, I'm not making this up. Honestly. Don't you wonder who these people are?

More Hints from Heloise.

2 comments:

abigail emerson said...

Whenever I read that column I wonder how it can possibly stay in syndication because it's so ridiculous. But then I realized a surprising number of people I know read it just for kicks.

sarah said...

Ok, those are fantastic hints. And honestly, I already do them all... so that's embarrassing. (except for the tp one...that's just smart...)