The Bank

I was decluttering tonight and came across a list of quotes I kept while working at the Wells Fargo Phone Bank oh-so-many years ago (okay, 3 years ago). I spoke with a ridiculous number of insane customers while I was there and I'm sad I could only keep track of so many. (I had kept track of more, but my first quote list mysteriously disappeared from my triangle-shaped cube after hours one night. I'm still upset about it.)

There were the lonely, chatty customers:

"Can I tell you a story? What do you get when you have a fish and an elephant? Swimming trunks!" (Ha!)

"This is the history of 'me'... let me begin..." (Oh boy.)

The incredibly unintelligent customers from Alaska:

"We live in a bush. The only Wells Fargo is 150 miles away and only accessible by airplane."

"I can walk around with my phone!" (Revolutionary!)

"My husband just hit a moose with his truck. The moose is still alive but it's not doing so well - it was vomiting and then, of course, the bowels let loose." (Wonderful. And why are you calling me?)

And, my personal favorite, the rude customers:

"Wells Fargo fucking sucks and you guys need help!" (Eloquently put.)

me: "Thank you for calling. I was happy to speak with you."
mother in background: "He wasn't happy to speak with yo ass, bitch!"

I can still hardly believe I made it out alive. Every night I thank my lucky stars that I stumbled upon wonderful Tree Trust and am employed in a job I enjoy, working with people I admire, for an organization I appreciate. It's the cat's pajamas. Really.